


we'll make a memory out of it

by eyelids90



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Drama with a hopeful tone, F/M, Introspective Dean, Post-Hogwarts, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:00:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23435056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eyelids90/pseuds/eyelids90
Summary: If this was a film, she would probably say she was sorry, that she had been confused, and beg for another chance, after confessing her undying love for him. But this was fact, not fiction. Dean reflects on his relationship with Ginny and why things don't always go as planned.
Relationships: Dean Thomas/Ginny Weasley, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Comments: 3
Kudos: 11





	we'll make a memory out of it

Dean Thomas had always been a glass-half-full kind of guy. In his opinion, feelings were temporary. That was how he knew that hard times, no matter how hopeless they may seem, would eventually pass. Because nothing was permanent. Sooner or later, the clouds would give away to the sun and your troubles would seem far away.

So, when Dean was just a little boy, and his father left his Mum, he thought it was his loss. Because his father would never get to see how her Mum struggled, but managed to raise a son on her own. And how brilliantly she did it. He would never get to see how successful his son would be. How kind. How honest. How much more of a man he was.

And as Dean got older, he found out his father was actually a wizard and had been murdered by Death Eaters because he had refused to join You-Know-Who. So, when Dean learned that his father had been alive the whole time and never felt the need to check on his wife and son, he wasn’t bitter. He thought “At least he was on our side”.

And when, at the ripe age of sixteen, he had his heart broken for the first time, he hadn’t been resentful. Not even when, shortly after, the person responsible for said broken heart started dating one of his friends. After all, he knew Ginny used to have a crush on the Boy-Who-Lived, anyway. So, when Harry kissed her in front of the whole Gryffindor common room, Dean couldn’t say he was surprised. Hurt? Sure. Angry? Well, it’s not really fun seeing the girl you like kissing another bloke, so yeah, suppose you can say Dean was angry. But he didn’t hold a grudge. He thought “You can’t change the past. What you can do is concentrate on the present”.

Let bygones be bygones, right?

Positivity. It was in his blood. That was the main reason Dean was such a likable guy. He didn’t indulge in conflicts or pointless fights. People do what they do, not because they intend to hurt you. Most of the time, you’re just collateral damage. We all do the best we can. And it’s not like you can control other people’s actions or feelings, anyway. So why waste your time brooding over something that you have no control over? 

Besides, when you’re down, the only way you can go is up.

For a long time, Dean’s life had been filled with bad luck and misfortunes. Recently, though, the tables had turned. Just like he had hoped they would. And now? Now, life was good.

After having endured the awfulness of his Ministry job, working on Department of Unidentifiable Magical Objects, Dean had finally changed careers. He was now a Quidditch Correspondent for the Daily Prophet. Dean had always been a sports fan. He still followed football, his first passion. However, at Hogwarts, he had found another passion: Quidditch. But he knew he wasn’t good enough to play professionally, so he chose a profession that allowed him to be around that atmosphere. And that was good enough for him. 

After that, things just kept happening for him.

His best friend Seamus moved back to London, after four years of living in Ireland. So now he spent his nights in pubs, reliving old stories about Hogwarts and how those were the days, while chugging on firewhiskey and muggle bear. Well, Seamus chugged. Dean would have preferred to do other activities that didn’t end up with Seamus drunk out of his arse, while singing Celestina’s Warbeck _My Baby Gave Me a Hippogriff for Christmas_ on top of the pub counter, but, hey, Dean was so glad to finally have his best friend back, that he didn’t object. Besides, it has already been established that Dean was a good guy.

Speaking of reconnecting, Dean also found another friend from his past. While covering a piece for the Daily Prophet about Gwenog Jones and the Holyhead Harpies, Dean ran into their newest acquisition, Ginny Weasely. After a couple of dates, the two rekindled their relationship and life got even better. Perfect, even. 

He had forgotten how wonderful Ginny was. How passionate she was about the world. How she was her own person and insisted on having her opinion heard. How she never backed down from a challenge. How _fun_ to be around she was, and how she made him laugh until he cried. Yesterday, it had been their four-month anniversary. Ginny had chucked when Dean pointed it out, and called him an irredeemable sap (“counting the months’ for teenagers”). But he didn’t care. He was happy. Ginny was happy. That was all that mattered.

But nothing’s permanent, remember? 

And one Saturday morning, Dean started to get the feeling his luck was about to change. They were having breakfast at Dean’s flat. Ginny was reading the Daily Prophet when the front page caught his eye. 

“Is that Harry?” he asked.

“Huh? Where?”

“There,” said Dean, pointing at a picture of Harry who looked none too pleased at being attacked by a camera’s flash. The headline read _Saviour of the Wizarding World spotted in Diagon-Alley_. “It’s been awhile since I saw his face in the papers.”

“That’s because he’s been in Norway,” Ginny said distractedly, her attention half on Dean, half on the article she had been reading.

“Oh,” said Dean surprised. “Really? How long was he there?”

“A couple of years.”

“That must have driven the journalists mad,” Dean joked. “Without their favorite toy around to stalk and everything.”

“I guess.” Ginny gave a non-committal shrug. “It was probably for the best. Harry was getting tired of all the attention; he needed a break. That’s why he asked for a transfer.”

“Oh,” Dean repeated. “I didn’t know you still kept in touch,” he added in a what he thought was a neutral tone.

“We don’t,” Ginny shrugged. “I haven’t seen Harry in years, actually. But Ron told me he was coming back. At first, I didn’t really believe him, I thought it was just wishful thinking on my brother’s part. But then I ran into him the other day.”

“Who? Ron?”

“What?” Ginny took her eyes off the Daily Prophet and finally looked at his boyfriend. “No, silly. Harry.”

“Oh.”

There was a pause in which Dean resumed eating his breakfast, only to realize he was not hungry anymore.

Ginny arched an eyebrow. “What is it?” she asked, sensing the tension.

“Nothing.”

She decided to push. “Is there something you want to tell me?”

“No,” he denied. He was determined to keep pretending everything was fine. Sometimes the best course of action is not to say what you’re thinking. 

“Okay.” Ginny decided to let it ago, although, Dean could see from the look on her face, she was not convinced. 

“It’s just…” he started, but hesitated mid-sentence. What was he going to say? And how was he going to say it without sounding like a jealous prat? “You didn’t tell me you had ran into Harry. Which is fine, by the way. It’s just… You could have told me, that’s all. Since I know the guy too. But, like I said, it’s fine. No big deal.”

“Sorry. I didn’t think you’d care,” said Ginny calmly, as she sipped her tea. 

She looked surprised at her boyfriend’s rambling, but amused nonetheless, which made Dean think that he had totally dodged a bullet. 

“He’s my friend,” he stated. 

Of course, he decided to press. Because, why quit while you’re ahead, when you can push your luck and risk messing everything up?

Ginny put down her mug and looked at him with a strange expression. “You haven’t spoken to Harry in years. I think the last time you saw him was at Hogwarts.”

“We, guys, don’t need to see each other every minute of every day in order to maintain a friendship. We have confidence that our bond is strong enough to survive the distance.”

Ginny arched an eyebrow. “I don’t think you’ve ever mentioned his name the whole time we’ve been together,” she observed half-amused, half-suspicious.

“So what? We shared a room for six years, that’s got to count for something, right?” Dean retorted, trying to sound casual. He wanted to make sure Ginny understood it was no big deal. “Just because he’s not in my life anymore, doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like to know what he’s been up to.”

Ginny laughed. “Okay, sorry! Next time Harry Potter, your dear friend, makes a move, I’ll be sure to owl you.”

And that was that. Dean never touched the subject again and Ginny didn’t bring it up either. Life went on as usual.

Honestly, as the days went by and Dean found himself ruminating about that particular conversation, he had to admit he’d been rather stupid. It was true he and Harry had been friends, but they’ve never been that close. Harry was always running around with Ron and Hermione, and after Hogwarts, they just lost touch. Also, it made sense that Ginny knew things about him. Her brother Ron was Harry’s best friend and he was close with the whole family. It seemed reasonable that she got to hear a thing or two about the guy.

Still, Dean felt uneasy. It didn’t help that Ginny’s schedule had been rather busy in the following months, or that they hadn’t spent as much time together lately. In the rare occasions they managed to be in the same room, they had so little time that all their conversations seemed rushed. 

Rationalizing, she looked the same. But she seemed to not laugh as much and sometimes Dean would catch her with a vacant expression, making him wondering what was on her mind. He had told her this, once. Mentioned it. Like it was no big deal. Because Dean didn’t like confrontations and life was finally good (he didn’t want to mess it up). Ginny had brushed it off, blaming it on Gwenog and her obsession with making sure her players were in absolute perfect condition for the English League. He supposed she looked rather tired. Her complexion seemed duller, she had dark circles under her eyes, which she had tried to conceal, and her demeanour seemed heavier.

“You’re being paranoid, Dean. Everything’s fine. I’m just tired and things have been kind of hectic lately, but as soon as the League is over, everything will go back to normal.” 

But it didn’t. And Dean grew more and more paranoid. Her letters were less frequent, her enthusiastic, bubbly personality was replaced by a sullen, distant one. 

It didn’t help that all Ginny’s family seemed to talk about was Harry Potter. Ron and Hermione were particularly thrilled to have his friend back. Which made the weekly Sunday lunches at the Weasleys awkward. But you know Dean, he was a glass-half-full kind of guy, so he tried to come up with all the perfect reasonable explanations as to why Ginny wasn’t interested in Harry’s return.

Firstly, she didn’t look particularly enthusiastic every time Harry’s name was mentioned. She usually stayed silent and detached anytime Ron bragged about Harry’s endeavours. Because, of course, he’s going to be up to shenanigans. He’s Harry Potter, after all. He couldn’t live a quiet life, even if he wanted to. Fortunately, Dean hadn’t ran into Harry in any of the Weasleys gatherings, which made it easier for him not ignore his return. He really thought that if he didn’t talk about him or thought about him, that he would cease to exist. 

And secondly, Ginny never talked about him. Ever. Well, despite the one or two occasions Dean had thrown his name in the conversation, causally (like it was no big deal), just to get a sense of her reaction. And her reaction seemed… well, normal. Except for that time Dean lost it when, after much prodding and pressing, Ginny told him they’d been running in the same circles.

“He’s there for work, Dean! Jack’s been receiving some death threats and Harry’s lead investigator on the case. And I’m always at practice. Honestly, what do you think it’s going to happen? That I’m going to ditch my team to make out with him?”

Of course Harry Potter shouldn’t be a problem for Dean and Ginny. But he was. They never talked about the fact that Harry and Ginny had history. Maybe if he didn’t bring it up, if they never talked about it, it would no longer be true. And it wasn’t like Ginny had cheated on him while they had been together all those years ago. She had done nothing wrong. Sometimes relationships just don’t work out. And Dean had won, in the end. Harry and Ginny had dated for… what? Two months when she was fifteen? Dean was the one dating Ginny now. Honestly, he had nothing to worry about.

Except she was starting to drift away. From him. And now there was no English League to serve as an excuse or a work schedule to blame. She just didn’t seem as invested in their relationship as before. The dark circles were still poorly concealed, her skin still had that pale tone. And that detached expression was more and more frequent these days.

Dean started to become frustrated with his paranoias. Disappointed that she didn’t seem as thrilled to see or be with him anymore. She started to grow angry at his actions. They were fighting. A lot. 

She was fed up with his attitude of wanting to resolve all her problems, as if she couldn’t do it on her own. As if she would break in the face of adversity. As if she was this stupid little girl who couldn’t take care of herself.

He didn’t understand why she got so worked up, just because he wanted to make her life simpler. That he loved her enough to not want her to get hurt. That he would do _anything_ for her. Because he loved her. 

And because there is always that occasion which precipitates everything, he opened his mouth. She warned him not go there. He ignored her. 

“I just don’t understand why a simple suggestion sends you over the edge. I mean, what is the problem with wanting my girlfriend to be safe?”

“Simple suggestion?” Ginny snorted. “Seems more like an ultimatum.”

“What?” Dean asked in disbelief. “Do you even hear yourself? I just thought it would be a good idea if you took the position as a Correspondent for the Daily Prophet! What’s so bad about that?”

“Nothing!” Ginny cried, visibly frustrated. “For you! But I don’t want to be a Quidditch Correspondent for the Daily Prophet! I want to be a Quidditch Player. I like my life; I love what I do!”

“What you do got you in St. Mungus more times than I can count this past month,” Dean spat, without being able to stop himself. 

“So what?”

So what? If there was one thing Dean had always admired about Ginny was her bravery. He could never do the things she did. But this was just plain stubbornness. It as reckless.

“Stop trying to prove a point! It’s dangerous, Ginny. I just want you to be safe, that’s all,” he pleaded. “If you took the job in the Daily Prophet, you’d be able to do all things Quidditch related. And you’d be working with me.”

“Dean,” Ginny said, trying to regain control of her emotions. “I’m a Quidditch player. And a bloody good one, at that.”

“I just want you to be safe.” 

He had to make her understand.

“So, if the roles were reversed, and you were the one playing Quidditch and I told you to stop doing the one thing that made you happy, you’d do it?”

“Well, I…” 

Then, it all went to shit. A fight ensued. Feelings were hurt, expectations shattered.

But Dean was an optimist. In his mind, there was still time to salvage this. He could still fix it. Because he loved her. He just needed to show her. To let her know. So that she could understand. That he would do anything for her.

So, he showed her a little black box. Some would call it desperate, others foolish. But Dean wanted to be brave, just like she was. He would show her. They belonged together. The fact that they found their way to each other once again was proof of that. 

Yes, how could he had not thought of it sooner? It was perfect. Then, she would then finally see that their fights were pointless in the big scheme of things. It didn’t matter, as long as they loved each other.

But when he showed it to her, she didn’t jump with joy or threw her arms around his neck as she kissed him with passion never seen before. 

“I can’t marry you, Dean. Not like this. I’m sorry.”

And just like that… feelings were hurt, expectations shattered.

She had said it before, ten years ago.

_I can’t be with you, Dean. Not like this. I’m sorry._

And he knew she was. But it still hurt so fucking much. Because he loved her. 

But she didn’t love him.

So, Dean did what every other twenty-six-year-old guy with a broken heart did. He owled his boss, telling him he would take some much-needed vacation. Pulled the curtains down, didn’t leave his bed for days. Ate tuna more times than he could count. Avoided his friends’ owls, stopped going out to pubs with Seamus. Avoided his family’s calls. Had a lot of sleepless nights. Stayed pretty much inside his house, reliving the moments he spent with Ginny and wondering how useless can you be if you can fuck up your relationship, not once, but twice. 

Ruminating about his worthlessness and all the bad moments of his relationship had become Dean’s favourite hobby. He knew it only aggravated the situation and it was no use indulging in this pity party he seemed to had thrown for himself, but he couldn’t help it.

Once again, she had left. And once again, there was no huge fight, no unforgivable action on her part. Just the facts. They didn’t belong together. 

So, he stayed inside and didn’t talk to anyone. And he did that for two weeks.

Then, Seamus set up camp at his apartment’s door refusing to leave until he let him in. He eventually did, and Seamus told him he was too good for her, that he never really liked her anyway and had seen the train wreck a mile away. Which was a lie, but Dean appreciated the effort. 

He started to answer his mother’s calls and even replied to a couple of owls. Went back to work, although he stayed mostly at the office, writing commentary pieces. He decided to avoid all places where he knew Ginny might be. 

And then, really, really slowly, day by day, things went from completely miserable to okay. An _I-might-risk-leaving-the-house-today_ okay, but an okay nonetheless. And little by little, without realising, his life went back to normal.

It was only months later that he put his new found stability to the test. He had been window shopping at Diagon-Alley one day, when he decided to stop and have a break at Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour. That was when he saw her. 

Ginny Weasley. 

She was standing outside Madam Malkin's, talking animatedly with Hermione and God, did she look beautiful. She had cut her hair; it used to be longer, now it didn’t go past her shoulders. Hermione seemed to have said something that made Ginny laugh. But not the stiff one Dean had witnessed multiple times when things first started to go down between the two of them. A whole-hearted laugh that made her body shake.

It had been a long time since Dean had seen her this happy. 

He had the sudden urge to go talk to her. He kept telling himself that it didn’t have anything to do with how much he missed her. No, he just wanted to prove himself that he could withstand a conversation with Ginny Weasley without falling apart. Yes, that was all it was.

Hermione left and Dean started making his way towards her, when something made him stop.

A man was approaching her. He reached her from behind and put his arms around her waist which made Ginny jump with surprise. When she turned around, Dean was sure this man was about to witness the famous Weasley Bat-Bogey Hex. But Ginny just smiled and… hugged him? And then she was smiling and they were kissing.

Dean didn’t know if it was a coping mechanism his brain had recently developed, but it was only when they pulled apart that he recognized the man. He seemed taller than the last time Dean had seen him and he wasn’t wearing his glasses, but Dean didn’t need to see the lighting-shape scar on his forehead to know he was looking at the face of Harry Potter.

Something must be broken inside of him, because the image of Ginny in Harry’s arms made him laugh. Suppose he should feel angry and humiliated. After all, it was the second time she had left him for Harry bloody Potter. However, Dean just stood there, laughing so hard until it brought tears to his eyes.

Oh, the irony was just too good to go unnoticed.

Don’t get him wrong, Dean was mad. Just not _at_ her. It takes two to tango. If they failed, it’s safe to say that both had contributed to it. And it had taken four months and seeing Ginny with Harry to make Dean realise he didn’t blame her. Ginny couldn’t control that fact that she loved Harry as much as Dean couldn’t control the fact that he loved her.

Guess, it just wasn’t meant to be. God knows they’ve tried. Twice.

In retrospective, Dean thought it had probably been a bad idea to ask Ginny to marry him. He should have known she would never settle.

Harry spoke something in Ginny’s ear. She nodded and he went inside the shop. She turned around and her eyes met Dean’s, as if she knew he’d been there the whole time. There was a brief moment in which they just stood there, holding each other’s gaze. Then, slowly, as if unsure it was the best course of action, she walked over to him.

If this was a film, she would probably say she was sorry, that she had been confused, and beg for another chance, after confessing her undying love for him.

But this was fact, not fiction.

“We almost made it,” he said.

“Yeah,” she agreed, “but making it is overrated.”

And it was okay, though. Maybe not now, but Dean knew that he would be okay. 

Because nothing is permanent; everything is temporary. And Dean was sure that this, just like all his previous hardships, would pass. He was an optimist, you see. 

Better days would come.

**Author's Note:**

> The title of this story is taken from Imagine Dragon’s _Not Today_. Such a beautiful song. I’m thinking of writing a companion piece with Ginny’s POV or Harry’s. Anyway, thanks for reading and let me know what you think.


End file.
